A Daily Lent

The Subtle Temptation to Self-Fascination Friday of the Fourth Week of Lent – March 27, 2020 In times of crisis, when the abnormal is the new normal, we can be tempted to look after our own self and those close to us, to the exclusion of “others.” Hoarding goods – so I have more than enough, whether you have enough or not – is simply one expression of the human desire to preserve self. I imagine we have all felt the urge to “look out for number one” as the coronavirus threat has grown. To be fully human means not to be invested solely in self-interest. The fully human life sees oneself in the context of the human family. We live in a web of relationships that reach much farther than we can see. We have responsibilities not just for ourselves and our near circle of relationships . . . we share responsibility for one another. These are Esther de Waal’s words: But these vows also carry an even greater significance. While they help me to be human they also at the same time p...

Inner Freedom Wednesday of the Second Week of Lent – March 11, 2020 We are social beings. All of our lives, from our first days to our last day, we constantly are learning how to live in relationship with each other. Often, though, the clues we take from others are about people-pleasing, adapting ourselves and our behaviors to the expectations of those in our life-world. It is quite common – and in fact, may have become the cultural norm – for persons to shape their lives to the expectations and demands of those around us. Inner freedom is one of the key ideas in the spiritual life. Inner freedom does not have to do with our outer freedom, that is, how free we are to come and go and do as we please. This kind of outer freedom is what adolescents strive for, and what most adults continue seeking throughout life. Inner freedom is different. It is the freedom to be the person you were created to be, rather than the person who is pushed and pulled by circumstances, conditions, a...

Good Friday – April 3, 2015 AN OLDER MONK AND A YOUNGER MONK were in Cellia. The older suggested that they live together. The younger refused, saying, “I am a sinner, Abba. I must not live with you.” But the older monk insisted. The old man was pure in heart, and the younger monk did not want him to discover that he sometimes had sexual cravings. The older monk said, “I will go away for a week. When I return, we can talk about this again.” Seven days later, the younger decided to test the older by saying, “While you were gone, I was strongly tempted. I went into town on an errand, and I ended up in bed with a woman.” The older monk asked, “Are you penitent?” “Yes.” “Then I will carry half the burden of this sin with you.” The younger man responded, “Now I know we can stay together.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , pp. 146 – 147] Most people feel that their own sin is so unique, so dark, so despicable, that no one else would understand it, much less st...

Maundy Thursday – April 2, 2015 ON A FEAST DAY IN CELLIA, brothers gathered to eat a meal at church. One of them told a server, “I do not eat anything that has been cooked. I only eat salted food.” The server called out to another, “This brother does not eat cooked food! Bring him some salt.” One of the brothers told the one on the restricted diet, “You would have done better to eat meat alone in your cell today than to have had this announced in front of everyone.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 355] The spiritual practice of self-control reminds me that my own will and desire is not the defining context for life. Certainly it is one context for life, just not the only one. The story of MY life is always lived out in the context of the story of OUR life . . . whatever the “our” may be for you and me. “Our life” may include family, church, community, and work . . . but it also includes “our life” as a human family, who you are and who I am as a part of the la...

Wednesday of Holy Week – April 1, 2015 AMMA SYNCLETICA said, “We should always be discreet, remaining a part of the community rather than following our own desires. We are exiles from the world. We devote ourselves to faith in God. We have no need of the things we have abandoned. In the world, we had status and a wide variety of food. Here we have a little to eat and not much of anything else.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 3] I am highly introverted by nature. I prefer a corner of the room and a good book to a lot of conversation. Often, I’m slow to respond in conversation or when asked for my opinion. My opinions do not form by speaking them – as with many extraverts – but by thinking about them, slowly letting them gestate within me. [I once heard a young adult talk about dating someone who was high introvertly. She said that in the course of normal conversation, he would go silent . . . then several days later, he would pick up the conversation from tha...

Tuesday of Holy Week – March 31, 2015 A BROTHER became tired of his community and the behavior of others often annoyed him. He decided, “I will go off somewhere by myself. Then I will neither talk nor listen and shall be at peace. This anger I feel will depart.” He went out into the desert and made his home in a cave. One day he placed a water jug he had filled on the ground. It rolled over, spilling its contents. He filled it again and it fell over again. When this happened the third time, he became enraged, took hold of the jug and smashed it against the rocks. Calming down, he realized that anger had mocked him. “Here I am by myself and anger has beaten me. I will return to the community. Wherever we live, we need to work at being patient with God’s help.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 110] The brother in this story could be any of us. The impulse to move away from difficulties, troubles, and struggles lives within us. We see our own interior land...

Monday of Holy Week – March 30, 2015 Two old men had lived together for many years and had never fought with one another. The first said to the other, “Let us also have a fight like other people do.” The other replied, “I do not know how to fight.” The first said to him, “Look, I will put a brick between us, and I will say, ‘It is mine,’ and you say, ‘No, it is mine,’ and so the fight will begin.” So they put a brick between them and the first said, “This brick is mine,” and the other said, “No, it is mine,” and the first responded, “If it is yours, take it and go” – so they gave it up without being able to find an occasion for an argument. [Benedicta Ward, The Wisdom of the Desert Fathers , p. 37] This is one of the classic stories from the Desert tradition, quaint and almost too good to be true. Two old men who had lived together for many, many years did not know how to have a fight. I’d venture to say that even those who have lived in close proximity for a short period ...

Palm Sunday – March 29, 2015 Amma Syncletica said: “It is good not to get angry, but if this should happen, the Apostle does not allow you a whole day for this passion, for he says: “Let not the sun go down” (Eph. 4:26). Will you wait till all your time is ended? Why hate the person who has grieved you? It is not they who have done the wrong, but the devil. Hate sickness but not the sick person.” [Benedicta Ward, The Sayings of the Desert Fathers , p. 233.] Today we step into Holy Week, which moves us into the final days of Jesus’ life. The week invites us to join Jesus in his journey through these days of betrayal, arrest, trial, and crucifixion. Our stories from the Desert Fathers and Mothers this week invite us to consider self-control as a spiritual practice. These Desert Christians, living in the wilderness areas of Egypt and the Middle East, were monks (from the Greek word monos , which means “one” or “singular”); however, they also lived in community, sharing meals, pra...

Saturday of the Third Week of Lent – March 14, 2015 THEOPHILUS, ARCHBISHOP OF ALEXANDRIA, visited Scetis. The brothers urged Abba Pambo to speak to the bishop in order to edify him. Pambo replied, “If my silence does not edify him, there is nothing he can learn from my speech.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 256] In the Hebrew Scriptures, when Elijah hid from God in a cave, God was manifested to him not in loud, over-the-top epiphanies (wind, earthquake, fire), but in a “still, small voice” . . . “a gentle whisper” . . . literally, “a silent shout” (1 Kings 19:11 – 12). Throughout the centuries, Christians within the contemplative tradition have believed that silence is the first language of God. If you think about it, silence is a universal language. You may or may not be conversant in Spanish, Chinese, or Swahili, but each of us can speak and listen to the language of silence. In the Contemplative worship service I am a part of each Sunday morning, we so...