A Daily Lent

Resurrection Sunday – April 5, 2015 THEODORUS THE ASCETIC said, “The patriarch Abraham offered hospitality to everyone who passed by his tent, even the bad-mannered and undeserving. Because of this, he also entertained God’s angels. If we practice unconditional hospitality, we may welcome not only angels, but also the Lord himself. Jesus told us, ‘As you did it to one of the least of these who are members of my family, you did it to me’ (Matthew 25:40). It is good to be kind to everyone, especially anyone who is not able to repay you.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 373] The final spiritual practice in the Wisdom of the Wilderness series is charity. For some of us, charity is a weak word, a word to be avoided. Actually, charity is love in action, self-giving, and the generous offering of oneself for another. Of course, today is Easter, the day on which we remember and celebrate Resurrection. Resurrection entails far more than the historical event of Jesus’ rai

Holy Saturday – April 4, 2015 A brother at Scetis committed a fault. A council was called to which Abba Moses was invited, but he refused to go to it. Then the priest sent someone to say to him, “Come, for everyone is waiting for you.” So he got up and went. He took a leaking jug, filled it with water and carried it with him. The others came out to meet him and said to him, “What is this, Father?” The old man said to them, “My sins run out behind me, and I do not see them, and today I am coming to judge the errors of another.” When they heard that, they said no more to the brother but forgave him. [Benedicta Ward, The Sayings of the Desert Fathers , pp. 138 – 139.] Abba Moses was a former robber, who gave up his life of marauding and thievery to live as a monk dedicated to God in the desert. A formerly vicious man, late in life Moses became known for his compassion. To others, he seemed to embody God’s generosity and mercy. Scetis was one of the large monastic communitie

Good Friday – April 3, 2015 AN OLDER MONK AND A YOUNGER MONK were in Cellia. The older suggested that they live together. The younger refused, saying, “I am a sinner, Abba. I must not live with you.” But the older monk insisted. The old man was pure in heart, and the younger monk did not want him to discover that he sometimes had sexual cravings. The older monk said, “I will go away for a week. When I return, we can talk about this again.” Seven days later, the younger decided to test the older by saying, “While you were gone, I was strongly tempted. I went into town on an errand, and I ended up in bed with a woman.” The older monk asked, “Are you penitent?” “Yes.” “Then I will carry half the burden of this sin with you.” The younger man responded, “Now I know we can stay together.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , pp. 146 – 147] Most people feel that their own sin is so unique, so dark, so despicable, that no one else would understand it, much less st

Maundy Thursday – April 2, 2015 ON A FEAST DAY IN CELLIA, brothers gathered to eat a meal at church. One of them told a server, “I do not eat anything that has been cooked. I only eat salted food.” The server called out to another, “This brother does not eat cooked food! Bring him some salt.” One of the brothers told the one on the restricted diet, “You would have done better to eat meat alone in your cell today than to have had this announced in front of everyone.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 355] The spiritual practice of self-control reminds me that my own will and desire is not the defining context for life. Certainly it is one context for life, just not the only one. The story of MY life is always lived out in the context of the story of OUR life . . . whatever the “our” may be for you and me. “Our life” may include family, church, community, and work . . . but it also includes “our life” as a human family, who you are and who I am as a part of the la

Wednesday of Holy Week – April 1, 2015 AMMA SYNCLETICA said, “We should always be discreet, remaining a part of the community rather than following our own desires. We are exiles from the world. We devote ourselves to faith in God. We have no need of the things we have abandoned. In the world, we had status and a wide variety of food. Here we have a little to eat and not much of anything else.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 3] I am highly introverted by nature. I prefer a corner of the room and a good book to a lot of conversation. Often, I’m slow to respond in conversation or when asked for my opinion. My opinions do not form by speaking them – as with many extraverts – but by thinking about them, slowly letting them gestate within me. [I once heard a young adult talk about dating someone who was high introvertly. She said that in the course of normal conversation, he would go silent . . . then several days later, he would pick up the conversation from tha

Tuesday of Holy Week – March 31, 2015 A BROTHER became tired of his community and the behavior of others often annoyed him. He decided, “I will go off somewhere by myself. Then I will neither talk nor listen and shall be at peace. This anger I feel will depart.” He went out into the desert and made his home in a cave. One day he placed a water jug he had filled on the ground. It rolled over, spilling its contents. He filled it again and it fell over again. When this happened the third time, he became enraged, took hold of the jug and smashed it against the rocks. Calming down, he realized that anger had mocked him. “Here I am by myself and anger has beaten me. I will return to the community. Wherever we live, we need to work at being patient with God’s help.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 110] The brother in this story could be any of us. The impulse to move away from difficulties, troubles, and struggles lives within us. We see our own interior land

Monday of Holy Week – March 30, 2015 Two old men had lived together for many years and had never fought with one another. The first said to the other, “Let us also have a fight like other people do.” The other replied, “I do not know how to fight.” The first said to him, “Look, I will put a brick between us, and I will say, ‘It is mine,’ and you say, ‘No, it is mine,’ and so the fight will begin.” So they put a brick between them and the first said, “This brick is mine,” and the other said, “No, it is mine,” and the first responded, “If it is yours, take it and go” – so they gave it up without being able to find an occasion for an argument. [Benedicta Ward, The Wisdom of the Desert Fathers , p. 37] This is one of the classic stories from the Desert tradition, quaint and almost too good to be true. Two old men who had lived together for many, many years did not know how to have a fight. I’d venture to say that even those who have lived in close proximity for a short period

Palm Sunday – March 29, 2015 Amma Syncletica said: “It is good not to get angry, but if this should happen, the Apostle does not allow you a whole day for this passion, for he says: “Let not the sun go down” (Eph. 4:26). Will you wait till all your time is ended? Why hate the person who has grieved you? It is not they who have done the wrong, but the devil. Hate sickness but not the sick person.” [Benedicta Ward, The Sayings of the Desert Fathers , p. 233.] Today we step into Holy Week, which moves us into the final days of Jesus’ life. The week invites us to join Jesus in his journey through these days of betrayal, arrest, trial, and crucifixion. Our stories from the Desert Fathers and Mothers this week invite us to consider self-control as a spiritual practice. These Desert Christians, living in the wilderness areas of Egypt and the Middle East, were monks (from the Greek word monos , which means “one” or “singular”); however, they also lived in community, sharing meals, pra

Saturday of the Fifth Week of Lent – March 28, 2015 The brothers praised a monk before Abba Antony. When the monk came to see him, Antony wanted to know how he would bear insults; and seeing that he could not bear them at all, he said to him, “You are like a village magnificently decorated on the outside, but destroyed from within my robbers.” [Benedicta Ward, The Sayings of the Desert Fathers , p. 4] Endurance for the Desert Christians invited reflection on what they believed about themselves. Were they able to bear up underneath insults and humiliations? No one likes to be embarrassed, insulted, or humiliated. It is, well . . . embarrassing, insulting, and humiliating!! But there are few things as helpful as embarrassments, insults, and humiliations to reveal to us what we truly believe about ourselves. They offend our sense of fairness and rightness, as we tell ourselves things like, “I don’t deserve this!” We want to be seen as a particular kind of person, with certain q

Friday of the Fifth Week of Lent – March 27, 2015 Someone asked Abba Antony, “What must one do in order to please God?” The old man replied, “Pay attention to what I tell you: whoever you may be, always have God before your eyes; whatever you do, do it according to the testimony of the holy Scriptures; in whatever place you live, do not easily leave it. Keep these three precepts and you will be saved.” [Benedicta Ward, The Sayings of the Desert Fathers , p. 2] These are Abba Antony’s three keys to life: in every moment, attend to God, who is present always and everywhere; let the scriptures shape your heart so that all you do issues from an interior that has been molded by God’s Word; and have a sense of stability and consistency about your life . . . no flitting around. The third part of Antony’s saying is particularly relevant this week related to endurance and perseverance. It is reflected, a couple of centuries after Antony, in the vision Benedict of Nursia had for his

Thursday of the Fifth Week of Lent – March 26, 2015 JOHN THE DWARF asked God to mitigate his passions. He became calm and imperturbable. He told a hermit, “I now rest in peace. There is no struggle between my flesh and my spirit.” The hermit replied, “Pray that the Lord will start a new war in you. Struggle is good for the soul.” When the old conflicts returned John did not pray that God would take them away. Instead, he prayed, “Lord, give me the strength to survive this battle.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 118] One prevalent modern-day heresy related to Christianity is that if you are faithful, you’ll never have to struggle in life. . . . or if you pray correctly, or pray enough, you’ll never experience tragedy. . . . or if you just believe enough, God will make you prosperous – health, wealth, and all the “good things” of life. Abba John the Dwarf – who was something of a Desert Father’s version of Simon Peter, always putting his foot in his mouth – t

Wednesday of the Fifth Week of Lent – March 25, 2015 Antony of Egypt was the first of the Desert Christians. I related some of Antony’s story in the first days of this year’s Lenten devotionals, so I won’t repeat his life story here. But it is important to know that 36 years elapsed from the time of Antony’s first entry into the desert to attend to his life with God, until the days when he took disciples (novices) whom he would mentor as a spiritual father (Abba). 20 of those years were spent in extreme solitude and silence, as Antony’s life was formed by the discipline and wisdom of the wilderness. Bishop Athanasius of Alexandria, a friend and student of Antony’s, wrote The Life of Antony in order to record some of Antony’s experiences from the desert. He writes a great deal about Antony’s struggles in the desert, the daily battles Antony engaged with the darkness within himself, as well as with demonic forces. During one extended period of time, Antony’s struggle with the dark

Tuesday of the Fifth Week of Lent – March 24, 2015 AMMA SYNCLETICA said, “If you start a good work, do not let the enemy discourage you. Your endurance will defeat the enemy. When sailors encounter unfavorable winds they do not toss their cargo overboard or abandon ship. They struggle against the storm for a while and then reestablish their course. If you run into a headwind, raise a cross as a sail and you will continue your voyage in safety.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 119] By and large, I find that modern folks give up far too quickly. We don’t seem to have the willingness to stick with things over a long haul. My sense is that we are distracted, that we chase after the next “shiny thing” that appears on the screen of our brain, and that we quickly move on to something new and different in order to stimulate ourselves. I also find that this inability to stick with things reflects an existential boredom with life, a boredom with the way things are. We live

Monday of the Fifth Week of Lent – March 23, 2015 A MONK VISITED ABBA SISOES and told him he had fallen from grace. “What should I do, Abba?” Sisoes replied, “Get up again.” After a while, the monk returned to ask, “What can I do now? For I have fallen again.” “Get up again,” the old man said to him, “Never stop getting up.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 386] We are too easily overcome by our failures. We are too quick to think of our own sin as unforgiveable, as – what MUST be so – the pinnacle of all sin. We live with a human economy of grace – which does not really represent God’s grace at all – that believes God’s resources are limited, that there is a scarce supply of God’s grace, God’s mercy, and God’s forgiveness. It is, in fact, a flaw in our thinking from which it is very difficult to recover. Jesus’ disciples spoke from that same framework of scarcity: “How many times should I forgive the one who sins against me? Seven times?” (Mt. 18:21 – 22

The Fifth Sunday of Lent – March 22, 2015 Amma Syncletica: "In the beginning there are a great many battles and a good deal of suffering for those who are advancing towards God and afterwards, ineffable joy. It is like those who wish to light a fire; at first they are choked by the smoke and cry, and by this means obtain what they seek . . . : so we must kindle the divine fire in ourselves through tears and hard work." [Benedicta Ward, The Sayings of the Desert Fathers , pp. 230, 231] This week, our readings from the Desert Fathers and Mothers illumine the spiritual discipline of endurance. To be honest, endurance may not be as much of a spiritual practice as it is one fruit of ongoing spiritual practice. One doesn’t set out to become a person of endurance so much as one cultivates the soul in a way that allows endurance to be formed within us. The Apostle Paul writes that endurance is part of the fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22 – 23). Fruit grows when we tend the

Saturday of the Fourth Week of Lent – March 21, 2015 One day Abba Arsenius consulted an old Egyptian monk about this own thoughts. Someone noticed this and said to him, “Abba Arsenius, how is it that you with such a good Latin and Greek education, ask this peasant about your thoughts?” He replied, “I have indeed been taught Latin and Greek, but I do not know even the alphabet of this peasant.” [Benedicta Ward, The Sayings of the Desert Fathers , p. 10] As a young adult in the late 1970’s, I was invited to hear Tom Landry speak at a big Fellowship of Christian Athletes luncheon in downtown Tulsa. Coach Landry led the Dallas Cowboys to several Super Bowls and was well-respected as a coach and leader. He was never an exciting speaker (in my opinion), but had a low-key way that seemed sincere and appealing. His talk in Tulsa was a big deal and drew a large following. What I remember most about his long, long talk that day, however, is that Coach Landry didn’t talk about football,

Friday of the Fourth Week of Lent – March 20, 2015 Having withdrawn to the solitary life he [Arsenius] made the same prayer again and he heard a voice saying to him, “Arsenius, flee, be silent, pray always, for these are the sources of sinlessness.” [Benedicta Ward, The Sayings of the Desert Fathers , p. 9] Arsenius was one of the most noted of the Desert Christians. Born about 360 in Rome, he was a well-educated and important person in Rome. A man of senatorial rank, he served as a personal tutor within the emperor’s palace. Desiring a life of meaning in God, he fled Rome secretly, sailing to Alexandria in Egypt. From there, he went into the desert as a novice under Abba John the Dwarf. Arsenius was known for his austerity and the depth of his silence. His degree of formal education was unusual in the desert, and made him seem forbidding to many of the other desert monks. He may be the poster-child for simplicity among the Desert Christians. By leaving the royal palace in

Thursday of the Fourth Week of Lent – March 19, 2015 God sells righteousness at a very low price to those who wish to buy it: a little piece of bread, a cloak of no value, a cup of cold water, a small coin. [Benedicta Ward, The Sayings of the Desert Fathers , p. 16] Life in the desert was stark, simple, and meager. The Desert Fathers and Mothers wanted to be freed from accumulating “stuff” so they could attend to their lives in God. If you think about it, any journey into the wilderness must be accompanied by simplicity. Survival in a desert does not depend on how much stuff you can carry into the desert. In the wilderness, you don’t have access to the same resources you might have in the city. You have to go into the wilderness light and lean in order to survive. It’s much the same way when you go camping in a modern sense. Of course, for some of us, camping means “Holiday Inn.” For others, camping means a “camper” or trailer which has many of the conveniences of home. Bu

Wednesday of the Fourth Week of Lent – March 18, 2015 ANTONY had everyone’s respect. He was considerate of those he visited. An eager learner, he gathered the best traits from others. He copied the self-restraint of one, and the cheerfulness of another. He absorbed gentleness, a love for reading, and the value of nocturnal devotions. He admired one who fasted, praising his determination, and another who slept on the bare ground, honoring his empathy. Antony remembered the love he observed, pondering it and attempting to imitate the best virtues of each person he met. He was never provoked to anger; the only fire that burned in him was a desire to live even better. People called him “God’s friend.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 232] Much of our addictiveness stems from the internal sense, imbedded deep within many of us, that we are fundamentally flawed. We don’t truly believe that we are okay. We live with a kind of toxic shame, convinced that we are inadequa

Tuesday of the Fourth Week of Lent – March 17, 2015 ONCE some robbers came into the monastery and said to one of the elders: “We have come to take away everything that is in your cell.” And he said: “My sons, take all you want.” So they took everything they could find in the cell and started off. But they left behind a little bag that was hidden in the cell. The elder picked it up and followed after them, crying out: “My sons, take this, you forgot it in the cell!” Amazed at the patience of the elder, they brought everything back into his cell and did penance, saying: “This one really is a man of God!” [Thomas Merton, The Wisdom of the Desert , p. 59] As a young boy, I learned that what is mine is mine, and what is yours is yours. If you take what is mine, that is stealing. If I take what is yours, that is stealing. I learned early to respect what you had, and to protect what I possessed. Of course, there are ancient injunctions against stealing. The 8th of the

Monday of the Fourth Week of Lent – March 16, 2015 ABBA NILUS said, “Have no desire for things to be as you prefer. If you desire only what pleases God, you will be spared confusion and your prayers will be of thanksgiving.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 351] When the first of the Desert Christians, Antony of Egypt, left the city for the desert in order to pursue a life of deepening connection to God, he did so in response to the words of Jesus to the rich, young ruler: “Sell all your possessions and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me” (Lk. 18:22). Antony was stirred by Jesus’ invitation to simplicity, to let go, and to follow. The spiritual practice of simplicity invites us to hold things loosely, to not clutch, grab, and hold life. The many things we have in our possession tend to clutter our sight. We spend time securing what we have, protecting it from others, and using it to define who we are. As A

The Fourth Sunday of Lent – March 15, 2015 ABBA ZOSIMAS would pick up small objects such as a nail, a short thread, and other valueless castoffs. He would ask, “Would you fight or argue over this? Would you harbor a grudge or get sick over this? That would be insanity. Anyone who is making progress in God can think of the entire world as this nail, no matter how much of the world he possesses. There is no harm in owning something, but trouble comes when we are attached to what we own.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 344] This week we will reflect on the spiritual practice of simplicity. The Desert Fathers and Mothers did not speak to simplicity as much as they modeled simplicity in their style of life, in their manner of following Christ. When they spoke about simplicity, they did so with the wisdom of their own depth of experience. At its root, simplicity has to do with contentment. It invites us to be content with what we have. It invites us to be content

Saturday of the Third Week of Lent – March 14, 2015 THEOPHILUS, ARCHBISHOP OF ALEXANDRIA, visited Scetis. The brothers urged Abba Pambo to speak to the bishop in order to edify him. Pambo replied, “If my silence does not edify him, there is nothing he can learn from my speech.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 256] In the Hebrew Scriptures, when Elijah hid from God in a cave, God was manifested to him not in loud, over-the-top epiphanies (wind, earthquake, fire), but in a “still, small voice” . . . “a gentle whisper” . . . literally, “a silent shout” (1 Kings 19:11 – 12). Throughout the centuries, Christians within the contemplative tradition have believed that silence is the first language of God. If you think about it, silence is a universal language. You may or may not be conversant in Spanish, Chinese, or Swahili, but each of us can speak and listen to the language of silence. In the Contemplative worship service I am a part of each Sunday morning, we so

Friday of the Third Week of Lent – March 13, 2015 BROTHER JOHN KLIMAKOS said, “Stillness in the soul is continual worship of God, being present in the divine presence. If an awareness of the name of Jesus comes with every breath, you will discover the importance of being still.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 381] Many of us associate good worship or authentic worship with fervor and emotion. It stirs the spirit and enlarges the heart. It moves a person to loud praise or to an ecstatic response to God. Depending on the person, it may include traditional hymns or contemporary praise songs. Who among us doesn’t want to feel a sense of stirring and release? It feels good. The Desert Christians, though, would have us know that such worship doesn’t last. The music ends. The sermon is over. Someone says a Benediction to conclude the hour of formal worship. We return to the parking lot, find our cars (donkeys or camels in the case of the Desert Fathers and Mothers??), and

Thursday of the Third Week of Lent – March 12, 2015 Abba Poemen said, “Water is naturally soft and stone is naturally hard. But let water drip continuously on a stone and it will erode. The word of God works the same way. It is soft and our hearts are hard, but if we hear the word of God frequently, it will open our hearts to reverence.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 148] This is one of my favorite images from the Desert tradition. I’ve carried it and returned to it for many, many years now. The saying gives me an image for the long journey that is spiritual formation. I am not instantly transformed, but am always in a process of becoming . . . becoming the person God created me to be. It is more than a story about silence. It is a saying about the heart, about the way our hearts are shaped by regularly allowing the word of God to “drip” upon it. The ancient practice of sacred reading (known as lectio divina ) suggests a slow reading of scripture that focu

Wednesday of the Third Week of Lent – March 11, 2015 A BROTHER asked a hermit, “Abba, if someone brings me gossip, should I ask him to stop speaking?” “No.” “Why?” “Because we also gossip. We would be asking someone else to do what we cannot do.” “Then what is the best thing to do?” “The best thing is to remain silent. Silence is better for us and for others as well.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 219] The Abbas and Ammas of the Desert had been shaped by their spiritual practices over a long, long period of time. Their wisdom was a gift of God, but it was also hard-earned. They lived disciplined, ascetic lives because they wanted to live in intimate connection with God. And they were able to share with others the fruit of that intimate connection. Yet, you never find them imposing their wisdom on others. They were not interested in correcting others who wanted to order life differently. In fact, they typically imparted wisdom to others only when asked.

Tuesday of the Third Week of Lent – March 10, 2015 Abba Poemen: “You may seem to be silent, but if your heart is condemning others, you are babbling ceaselessly. But there are may be another who talks from morning till night and yet is truly silent: that is, he says nothing that is not profitable.” [Benedicta Ward, SLG, The Sayings of the Desert Fathers , p. 171] Spiritual practices are always more concerned with shaping our interior, rather than simply improving or cleaning up our outer appearance. The spiritual practice of silence is more about our inner state than the noise around us or the words we speak. That is, the thoughts that rumble around in our minds are the source of most of our words. Our minds chase after distractions. They create elaborate commentaries to help make sense of things that happen to us in the world. Our interior life needs transformation. Our words will reflect that interior change. To put it another way, our doing and our speaking (external m

Monday of the Third Week of Lent – March 9, 2015 ANTONY tested a group that came to visit him by quoting a verse of Scripture. Beginning with the youngest, he asked each for an interpretation. They responded as well as they could, but Antony told them he did not think they understood the verse. Finally, he turned to Abba Joseph. “How would you explain these words?” Joseph replied, “I do not know.” Antony was elated. “Abba Joseph has found the way, because he admitted he did not know.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 2] The tongue (words we speak) reveals what lives within us. We use words to impress others, to demonstrate how smart (or wise, or vulnerable, or humble, or eloquent, or compassionate) we are. The words we choose are full of our inner-most motives. That’s not to say that there is never a time to speak. Rather, in the Christian spiritual life we are invited to a greater and deeper awareness of our words, and how they reflect our own interior

The Third Sunday of Lent – March 8, 2015 AN EGYPTIAN HERMIT said, “If you desire a spiritual pilgrimage, begin by closing your mouth.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 137] The wisdom of the wilderness this week is silence and stillness. Most of us believe that we could use a bit more stillness in our lives. By that, we may mean that we wish not to be bothered by traffic noise . . . the ringing of our telephones . . . the incessant demands of television commercials . . . and the chatty neighbor who will not stop talking. Certainly, we would experience more silence if those things were lessened around us. The spiritual practice of silence, however, is not first of all about having a quiet, unobtrusive setting in which to live or pray. Silence as a spiritual discipline begins with guarding our tongues. Even more, it begins with guarding our thoughts, for all the words we speak begin within us as thoughts. The Desert Fathers and Mothers went to the wilderness in

Saturday of the Second Week of Lent – March 7, 2015 MALICIOUS skeptics visited Abba Agathon to see if they could annoy him. They had heard that Agathon possessed great discretion and self-control. They spoke directly to him, “Agathon, we heard that you are an adulterer and full of pride.” He answered, “Yes, that’s true.” “Are you the same Agathon who gossips and slanders?” “I am.” “Are you Agathon the heretic?” “No, I am not a heretic.” “Why did you patiently endure it when we slandered you, but refuse to be called a heretic?” Agathon answered, “Your first accusations were good for my soul, but to be a heretic is to be separated from God. I do not want to be apart from God.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 237.] The Desert Fathers and Mothers put up with a lot. There are frequent stories that report the abuse they took from naysayers and those who did not understand their lives. Similar to those who frequently tried to trip up Jesus, these skeptic

Friday of the Second Week of Lent – March 6, 2015 Abba Antony said, “Fish, if they linger on dry land, die: even so monks that linger outside their cell or live with people of the world fall away from their vow of quiet. As a fish must return to the sea, so must we to our cell: otherwise through lingering outside, we might forget the watch within.“ [Helen Waddell, The Desert Fathers , p. 91.] I find it helpful to have a consistent place where I can be alone with God. I’m certainly aware of God’s presence with me always and everywhere, but to have one place dedicated to my connection to God helps ground me. It is my own “cell” in the monastic sense. My “cell”, the place to which I return day after day to be alone with God, is an old, beat-up chair in my home study. If you saw the chair, you wouldn’t give me $5 for it. It has been around since the mid-1980’s. It was an early furniture purchase in the first little Northeast Texas town I served as pastor after seminary. We boug

Thursday of the Second Week of Lent – March 5, 2015 AMMA SYNCLETICA said, “Money in an open treasury is soon spent. Any virtue will be lost if it becomes public knowledge. Wax in front of a fire will melt. Shower vain praises on a soul and it will become weak. The soul will look for goodness with less fervor.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 93.] The Desert Mothers and Fathers believed that spiritual practices could have their full effect on us only when we practice them in secrecy. This is another aspect of solitude. In fact, many took up “secrecy” (as it relates to one’s virtuous actions or spiritual practice . . . NOT as it relates to one’s addiction , brokenness, or sin) as a spiritual practice. They took their cue from Jesus in Matthew 6 . . . praying in secret and not before a crowd for recognition . . . fasting, but washing your face so that your countenance does not announce that you are fasting . . . giving alms, but not letting your right hand know

Wednesday of the Second Week of Lent – March 4, 2015 APHRAHAT THE PERSIAN ascetic said, “Our Lord instructed us to pray in secret, by which he means in your heart. He also told us to close the door. The door we must shut is the mouth. We are Christ’s temple, as the Apostle said, and the Lord enters your inner self in this temple. Christ will purge it of any uncleanliness, but only while the door (your mouth) is shut.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 374.] Jesus’ words in Matthew 6 about fasting, prayer, and almsgiving shape the season of Lent. Fasting attends to the personal dimension of the season. Almsgiving gives attention to the social or neighborly dimension of Lent. And prayer attends to our God-connection. In Matthew 6:6 – 8, Jesus says some strange words about the location of prayer. He encourages prayer, not on the street corners (that is, public places), where people would see and notice your holiness, but a quiet, interior location. “Go into your

Tuesday of the Second Week of Lent – March 3, 2015 EVAGRIUS PONTICUS wrote, “Notice whether or not you are truly in God’s presence when you pray. It could be that you are looking for recognition and approval from other people. If this is your motivation for prayer, it is a hollow prayer.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 361.] The Desert Christians took solitude very seriously. In one of the most famous sayings of the Desert, the wise Abba told the young seeker, “Go into your cell. Your cell will teach you everything.” The monk’s cell was his/her living quarters, usually a cave or a hut, and for these Christians, the quiet and solitude of the cell was where a person was most likely to confront his or her interior darkness. The cell became a kind of “furnace of transformation,” as some called it. Going into one’s cell meant withdrawal from other contact and concerns. In fact, most of these men and women fled into the desert to escape the wordy world of social manipul

Monday of the Second Week of Lent – March 2, 2015 Amma Syncletica said, “There are many who live in the mountains and behave as if they were in the town, and they are wasting their time. It is possible to be a solitary in one’s mind while living in a crowd, and it is possible for one who is a solitary to live in the crowd of his or her own thoughts.” [Benedicta Ward, SLG, The Sayings of the Desert Fathers , p. 234.] The spiritual practice of solitude offers us space to live more fully into our connection with God, apart from concern for how we appear to other people. In this sense, solitude provides a setting in which we can interact freely with God and begin to discern the purpose for which we were created. We, then, are able to come to some sense of our core identity apart from what other people say about us, think about us, or tell us we are. The Desert Fathers and Mothers recognized that it is possible for us to be alone, yet not truly be in solitude. In contemporary cult

Second Sunday of Lent – March 1, 2015 ONCE Abbot Anthony was conversing with some brethren, and a hunter who was after game in the wilderness came upon them. He saw Abbot Anthony and the brothers enjoying themselves, and disapproved. Abbot Anthony said: “Put an arrow in your bow and shoot it.” This he did. “Now shoot another,” said the elder. “And another, and another.” The hunter said: “If I bend my bow all the time it will break.” Abbot Anthony replied: “So it is also in the work of God. If we push ourselves beyond measure, the brethren will soon collapse. It is right, therefore, from time to time, to relax their efforts.” [Thomas Merton, The Wisdom of the Desert , p. 63.] This week, we consider the wilderness wisdom held in solitude. Solitude is the spiritual practice of being alone for the sake of attending to God. By attending to God alone, without the conflicting voices of others, we are able to discover more truly who God created us to be. Solitude wa

Saturday of the First Week of Lent – February 28, 2015 BROTHER JOHN KLIMAKOS said, “Keep your prayers completely simple. Both the tax collector and he prodigal son were reconciled to God when they spoke one simple idea. The tax collector said, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner’ (Luke 18:13). The prodigal son said, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you’ (Luke 15:21).” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 384.] Those who persevere at prayer over many years almost always find that their prayer becomes simpler, not more complex. It doesn’t become more verbose and eloquent. It becomes quieter, even non-verbal. A glance, a thought, a holy moment . . . these become the most profound experiences of prayer. You might want to try simplifying your prayer for two or three days. Sit in silence one day. On another day, choose a phrase from the Psalms or the Gospels, and simply repeat it over and over as a breath prayer. On yet another day, take a single word (

Friday of the First Week of Lent – February 27, 2015 EVAGRIUS PONTICUS wrote, “Focus your attention on your prayer. Do not allow any other thoughts to distract you. All they will do is interrupt your prayer. When the devils understand that you are serious about fervent prayer, they will suggest subtle things that seem important. Soon enough, you will be unable to continue praying. This will discourage you.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 173.] Contemplation is a part of the vast landscape of prayer. It is the aspect of prayer that moves us beyond words, thoughts, and images into a receptive silence, to an awareness of the deeper connection we have with God, which is beyond words, thoughts, and images. Contemplation is the expanding recognition of our union with God, the union for which we were created. We exist always in the heart of God, though in our regular lives, we seldom recognize it. In contemplation, we slow down, still our minds, and give attentio

Thursday of the First Week of Lent – February 26, 2015 ABBA ZENO told us, “If you want God to hear your prayer when you stand, stretching out your hands toward God, you must sincerely begin by praying for your enemies. When you do this, God will respect all you request.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 79.] For Abba Zeno, prayer began with praying for others. More specifically, the beginning of prayer is sincerely praying for your enemies. You cannot pray for your enemies for long without the experience changing you. Mostly, when you pray for your enemies, you learn that they are not truly enemies. They are simply other human beings who live life differently, see life differently, or believe differently that you do. They are wounded and broken, certainly, but so are you in different ways. Praying for your enemies is a transforming practice. It likely won’t transform your “enemies” nearly as much as it transforms you.

Wednesday of the First Week of Lent – February 25, 2015 ABBA AGATHON said, “I consider no other labor as difficult as prayer. When we are ready to pray, our spiritual enemies interfere. They understand it is only by making it difficult for us to pray that they can harm us. Other things will meet with success if we keep at it, but laboring at prayer is a war that will continue until we die.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 145.] Most Christians struggle in one way or another with prayer. People often ask for tips in prayer. They want advice about how to pray. They want to know how to fend off distractions. My sense is that folks intuit that prayer is important, even crucial, but that most of us are looking for a magic formula that some of the saints and mystics know, but is withheld from the rest of us. In short, we don’t want to struggle in prayer. We want it to be easy. So we look for a code or a key . . . just the right set of words to say . . . the book

Tuesday of the First Week of Lent – February 24, 2015 WHEN A BROTHER asked Abba Antony to pray for him, the old man replied, “Try to pray your own prayers.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 22.] The perennial wisdom in prayer is to pray as you can, don’t pray as you can’t. In other words, there is no need to lean always on the prayers of others. And there is no need mimic the words others use in prayer. No one can pray your prayers. No one can be attentive to God for you. No one else can hear God stir your heart. No one can tell God what it feels like to be you. No one else can offer your family and friends to God just the way you can. Antony responded to this brother – harshly, it may seem to us – as he did because he wanted the brother to grow up. He was concerned for his brother’s becoming in God. He wanted his brother to learn the value and goodness of his own prayer. I’m not suggesting that we should never pray for others who ask for our prayer. And I’m not

Monday of the First Week of Lent – February 23, 2015 EVAGRIUS PONTICUS wrote, “Often in my prayers I kept asking God for what I thought was good. I repeatedly made personal requests, unreasonably coercing God. I was not able to trust God’s providence to work things out for my best interests. When I got what I sought, I was sorry that I had insisted on my own desires. Things did not turn out the way I had imagined.” [Bernard Bangley, By Way of the Desert , p. 356.] Haven’t we all had the experience of asking God for something in prayer, then receiving what we requested. But after our prayer is "answered,” we slowly discover that it may not have been in our best interest. We received something that actually inhibited our growth, healing, or wholeness in God. How little we see of the big picture from where we live. We see “through a glass darkly,” says the Apostle Paul. We don’t truly know what is best for us. Somehow, our prayer and contemplation invites us to disp

First Sunday of Lent – February 22, 2015 Abba Macarius was asked, ‘How should one pray?’ The old man said, “There is no need at all to make long discourses; it is enough to stretch out one’s hands and say, 'Lord, as you will, and as you know, have mercy.' And if the conflict grows fiercer say, 'Lord, help!' He knows very well what we need and he shews us his mercy." [Benedicta Ward, SLG, The Sayings of the Desert Fathers , p. 131] This week we consider stories about prayer and contemplation. I was scared away from prayer as a young Christian by the eloquent prayers of some more seasoned Christians. I felt unable to formulate the lofty discourses that seemed required of the public prayer in my home church. So I gave up without starting. Over time, I realized that prayer does not consist merely of lofty and eloquent discourses. Rather, prayer is the honest communion we share with God, spending time in God’s presence, and presenting ourselves honestly to